Mommy Guilt. It's The Drugs...

So, this whole MOVING TO ANOTHER COUNTRY THING (in case you didn't know, we're moving from Michigan USA to Manchester, England in just over 3 weeks) has found us both seriously lacking and seriously over-attentive as parents.

Seriously lacking, in that we are most definitely over-relaying on the boob tube to entertain Number 1 son as we drag stuff off shelves and out of cupboards out to the everlasting garage sale.

Seriously lacking in that we are not having those earnest conversations about every piece of cheap-ass dilapidated plastic we call "toys" that are not making it into the "ship to England for a million dollars" pile. (Hey! The stupid Burger King Shrek toy is making the cut. What d'you want from me???)

And yet. Yet, when we sit back from the dust bunnies and the carefully wiped 1996 funky tableware that we'll surely make a mint on, we ask ourselves how is he handling this? And bravado aside, we've really done our best to talk him through what this whole move might mean. Quite honestly he has been nothing but gung-ho about the whole concept, as much as a nearly 5 yr old can. But in the last week, he seemed to turn a corner.

Suddenly he was Acting Out, especially with Mommy. Flying off the handle when instructed it was time to have dinner, clean his teeth, go to bed. I mean flying off the handle more than usual, you know?

This was Our Fault. No Doubt. We are not Paying Enough Attention. We are not guiding him through the whole process as well as we should. We are relying on Noggin too much as we ransack the house for precious belongings. We totally deserved this, and we needed to do something now.

My husband and I proceeded to self-flagellate and plan lots of extra quality time one-on-one activities. Very pleasant, but still with The Behavior, you now? And so, in a flash of inspiration, Husband mentioned that the boy had been on a certain medication (Nasonex, for allergies) for about the same period of time as The Behavior had emerged.

Try googling "Nasonex and Behavioral Changes."


3 days off the drugs, and Number 1 son is back to his sweet-ass self. Yeah, he whines and pushes the limits, but he's back to his largely giggling, silly and mellow self. Thank God. Now at least I know that if I am going to fuck up my son, it's all my doing. I hate it when people blame the drugs.


Anonymous said...

There's a lesson in this. At least for me it's: Guilt can steer you wrong. Often, probably.

Also: Kids are mysterious.

cinnamon gurl said...

Wow... great catch. It took me three years to figure out that the pill was making me nauseous. Three years!!

S said...

But...but...but...the Ricardo Montalban sound-alike on the commercial said Nasonex didn't have significant side effects!

Damn him.

Fairly Odd Mother said...

Oy, I want to fix the typo in that sign!

Ok, ok, glad you found out it was the drugs. I'd have said it was just the normal 5-year-old crazies, so I would've been no help at all. Maybe you can show him what happened to his brain on drugs by frying an egg in a pan.

Anonymous said...

Ugh. Speaking of Shrek toys, we have 6 of the effin' things from McDonald's. Dawson doesn't play with them so I threw them into the garbage and he must have saw them because he went into a rage.

I think fast food toys should be banned.

I hope the sale goes well!

Lindy said...

Glad to hear you boy's back to his old self. I can't believe there's only 3... THREE!!!!! weeks before you get here.

NotSoSage said...

God Bless Google. Ahem.

Julie Marsh said...

(snickering...not at you, but with you...promise)

Frankly, I think most of us ought to go through all the crap in our houses and ask ourselves, "Would I pay to ship this overseas?" It would be a great exercise in purgery (heh).

Tania said...

I would never have thought of an allergy drug as being mood altering. Good catch.

Julie Pippert said...

Occam's Razor. :)

We always go for the existential here, too. And it is usually just...hmmm, tired. LOL

Glad it was the simple thing, and good luck with the rest.

Oohhh, just read a comment. I need to say...these drugs are NOT TESTED ON CHILDREN. The instructions, side-effects, etc? Not considering children's bodies. I learned this the hard way.

You have to contact the drug manufacturer directly for reports they keep about reported side-effects in children.

It took this to convince my doctor that YES, drat it all, the antacid is causing constipation in my daughter...it's not a physical deformity!

Okay off the PSA soapbox.

Mimi said...

Good catch... now you won't feel guilty when you're unpacking and #1 son wants to watch Horrid Henry 10,000 times a day...

mamatulip said...

There's a life lesson to be learned here: When in doubt, blame the drugs.

It's what I do, anyway.

Suburban Turmoil said...

There's a part of me that's secretly envious of you packing up and moving to England- I'd sort of love (in a sadistic way, of course) to be forced to get rid of all the junk that's accumulated in our house and start fresh. *sigh*

BOSSY said...

You had Bossy at Manchester.

Anonymous said...

Laughing my ass off.

I always blame the drugs. It's easier. Besides, no one believes me. Everybody 'round these parts KNOWS I've fucked my children up.

No amount of medication could change that fact.