How can you be emptying a house of all its contents over two months, and still find on the day before you leave that you have MORE junk to dispose of?
It's been a trying week, and this afternoon I am going to pay my respects to Mike and his family. Ironically, his funeral is tomorrow--at the same time we take off for England. There's something morbidly poetic about it, and my work colleagues have commented how much of a gap there is there now, with both of us suddenly gone. It reminds me how much the cliches ring true--to seize the day, to treasure each moment, to live each day to the full. You could be dead tomorrow. Remember to put on clean underwear.
Mike would have made every morbid and black joke available at a moment like this. He was relentless and unapologetic about finding something funny in the most dire of moments. The fact that the hospital shaved his head into a mullett when he was in a coma--that would have provided him with much fodder. His wife wants that trait remembered beyond anything else, and so those who knew him are taking care to make fun of one another as much as possible, calling one another pussies, even while we cry at the awfulness of it all.
When I arrive home, neighbors will be at our house ready to drink with us on our last night here. And then tomorrow we cram the very last of our worldy possessions into a few suitcases, and head off to the airport for a new beginning.
We leave behind us so many dear friends, and Mike's death brings home how much it is easy to not take enough notice of those around you who make you who you are. As someone far from home, the friendships I have made over the fifteen years here have been everything. I have grown up here, become an adult, a wife, a professional, and a mother.
I am British, but much more so I am from here, where I have truly lived and become who I am today.
My husband Frank and I, we take with us our two little Michiganders. Jack, who was five on Monday, and Sam who is about to turn 10 months.
Me and my boys--Off on life's next great adventure. We're fearful, we're hopeful, and we're gripping on for dear sweet life. Wish us all the best. We'll see you on the other side....
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46 comments:
I'll have a bottle of wine waiting for you on this end, to calm your nerves. I'm assuming your a red wine kinda girl.
,
Oh, I wish you all best on you journey. In both in the direct and the broader sense.
red wine, and lots of it, Lindy;-)
Good Luck!
And remember, it's totally OK to sedate the kids for a cross country flight. :-]
Best of luck! Safe travels!
Looking forward to hearing more from across the pond...
Have a safe trip! Will future blog posts be written with a British accent? ;-)
I'm crying, Joy. Very happy for you.
I must wipe snot and tears off this keyboard and stop being such a total pussy.
Best of luck on our journey.
Can't wait to hear the posts from the newest chapter of your story.
And yes, red wine does cure all :)
Very touching; such a bigger goodbye than you expected.
Good luck...godspeed.
Julie
Using My Words
Oh I cannot wait to hear about your latest adventures. Travel safe
Good luck, good luck, good luck and good luck! Queen and country are girding their loins for your arrival on this side of the Atlantic. Cucumber sandwiches have been made, there's some controversy about Paddington and squeezy Marmite in the news, the Archers had a topical insert last night, my pumpkins are big and all red telephone boxes and black cabs are being polished as I type.
Have a very safe journey. Please hand in your z's before you board the plane. You may collect your s's and u's once you clear customs in the UK.
I have this strange feeling that things will turn out great for you and your family.
Good luck!
Good luck with the journey and welcome back to the UK for when you get here!
commenting on a comment. Doow, that is the best comment I have ever read. I even read it out loud to my other half.
Good luck. I hope you are greeted with some quality English weather!
Good luck to you!!
Good luck & enjoy the ride!
I wish you the safest, most noneventful journey, Joy, Frank, Jack, and Sam!
All the best!!!
(And you have great taste in names...)
So sorry for your friend's passing. Your posts make me sad for not having known him.
Missing you already. Be safe and please find an Internet cafe where you can drop us a quick line if only to confirm that all's well.
(I was a worrywart long before I became a parent.)
YAY. Can't wait to hear all about it.
Safe travels, friend!
Good luck, fly safe, and I can't wait to read what you write of England! -hugs-
Safe journey
I'm sure Michigan will miss you dearly.
Safe travels!
Bossy misses you already. America can't afford to lose a witty one such as yourself.
So, hung over from drinking the single malt I donated to the cause last night? ;)
Safe journey!
Send me a Midget if you can find one!
Have a safe journey!!! Can't wait to hear from you when you settle in!
Godspeed and bon voyage, Joy! Best of luck to you and your family. :)
All the best! Good luck.
Good Luck!! I spend a lot of time wondering what it'd be like to go back home after 10 years in the States - like you, becoming a mother, a professional, and for me a shock-horror triathlete.
I will be living vicariously through you. Now go and kick some Mancunian ARSE!
Trying to think of an Americanism to send you off with...Got it.
Happy trails...
Oh Joy, I'm so so sorry I missed your last day on US soil (stupid internet outage! grrrrr) but glad to hear you're taking it in stride. And with booze.
I look forward to hearing your adventures on the other side of the pond, and turning the late night email sessions into 5pm email sessions, Eastern Standard Time.
Huge wet sloppy kisses.
And send me some Mint Aeros.
Things in my life are crazy in so many ways. And I even doubt whether it is metaphysically possible to enjoy the moment.
Recently, I decided to enjoy it, to enjoy every sucky moment I have right now. Because things could be so much worse.
I HOPE IT GOES WELL. You are my hero. Please write a book about (a) How to be brave and upend your life and leave behind the familiar and (b) How to move to another country with two kids. Oh, and you can add 'how to find a job with a Ph.D. while you are at it.'
Wishing you safe travels with happy kids!
i hope you landed safely and are finding your feet, Joy, amidst all the mixed feelings and sorrow and anticipation.
and i hope Lindy's red wine was plentiful. looking forward to the new stories from your new old land.
Sooooo glad we're going to be on the same side of the Atlantic now m'dear. It really does make much more sense this way.
Good luck to you, but I don't think you'll need it. You have your boys and your terrific spirit. That's all you need to succeed wherever you go. Safe journey to you and yours.
Best of luck. The VERY best.
We're only a blog away...
miss you. please come back soon. xo
I'm so sorry about your friend. The world needs more mean-spirited people with big hearts.
How sucky.
Thinking of you and hoping your journey is a safe one.
I am so very sorry to hear about your friend. I wept reading that post (that I am just now getting caught up on).
We look forward to hearing alllll about your new adventure Joy.
xoxo
Bon voyage!
Can't wait to "see" you again!
Joy,
I'm so sorry to hear about Mike. My thoughts are with you - and his boys.
May your journey keep you safe and may you soon bring us tales of milk chocolate hob nobs and tea.
xo,
OTJ
So very strange that you're leaving and how much I'll miss you. Why is that? Perhaps because we're only a state away from each other...
Wishing you the best. Also wishing you the foresight to tell me months in advance when you'll be back in the states so I can make an effort to meet up with you again.
xo
Knowing fully well you disabled comments in your previous post for a reason... I'd like to say fuck you, I'm still gonna comment here. Fat load of good it did you.
Seriously, though, thank you for writing that. Of all the over-wrought obituaries that made him sound like he was his work and a wake that I thought was... sanitary to say the least, I really appreciate what you wrote about Mike.
That was real, that's how he was, and having read that really helps.
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